Birthday Cheers and Jeers

On this, my Day of Days, I ask myself, What is the importance of a birthday? I think of my 21,185 days of living (including Leap Year days) in the context of the wide variety of people I’ve met who have, to one degree or another, influenced my decisions and actions.

This is not a day of melancholy any more than I allow it to be on Holidays. I reserve those thoughts for every other day of the year for, if I should lump them all in one huge bundle of sorrow, floodgates might open and, as with most aspects of life, I prefer not to go with the flow. Which is not to say there are no periods of waterfalls. I might reflect on a few moments of the past but looking through the rearview mirror of time I’m assured that what is left behind is thoughtfully preserved for clearer visions of the future.

To whose standards are my “successes” put to judgment? Opportunists would discount my accomplishments for a single chance to claim their own perceived successes that they may gain from my materialism. In contrast, others would think of my life an insignificant existence as compared to theirs. But it is I who ultimately assesses my degree of worth.

Disappointments? People. Among those I’ve met, there are many whom I hadn’t the opportunity to really know - sometimes an acquaintance who was intended to be a friend remains a stranger. But I don’t regret having crossed paths with people who may have done me emotional and/or physical harm, without which I would have learned fewer lessons and taught me less about my inner-selves. Adversaries play a part in the development of a person’s attitudes just as much as those who have proven to be of positive influences.

I am who I am. I will be whoever I allow myself to become. I will continue to have experiences instead of dreams, fulfillment rather than regrets. If I were a different person, I might mistakenly regret that I have fewer “things” than others. That which I encounter, I cherish as lessons learned in the school of life, from which graduation comes in the form of a death certificate, not a certification of life.

Many of life’s instructors, including Guilt and Jealousy, have taught me that I have much more to learn. I’m so grateful that community players of my childhood implanted in me values whereby my subconscious dictates my actions.

Music has also molded many of my emotions and enhanced my awareness. It continues to take my mind where I would otherwise not visit; melodies give me rhythm, lyrics give me insight to philosophical dilemmas. I am not a singer. I am not a songwriter. I am an accompanist.

Regardless of my biological age, my spirit remains as youthful in mind as in the past. Wrinkles mark my age to others, but the reflection I see in the mirror discounts their importance for I accept the genetic footprints that have structured the wear and tear that life has dealt to my mind and body, if not my soul.

What’s the importance of my birthday? That I shall live on for an unknown period of time. That I am more a statistic than the person I am, have been or will be. That within a pre-subscribed number of years I will be on Social Security and given whatever benefits Medicare will afford my health. That the count of candles on the cake seems more indicative of my age than the two-digit numerical figure.

What of the future? I fear not the unknown because today is indeed the first day of the rest of my life. I accept that which I have no control over, yet take control and thoughtfully consider the challenges I may encounter that will change the course of my remaining years.

I travel along a road named Ronald Alan Rae – by design, a one-way dead end street. There have been no detours. I have traveled along many side streets, some mired with hazards, and made many stops to get my bearings on which direction to proceed so as to keep me on a journey filled with adventures. Compromises are made out of brotherly love. Sacrifices are mine to make.

Death has the right of way. My Creator has eminent domain. I have the rest of my life to travel along whatever avenues that fate will allow. I am alive, so I shall live and reserve the future past tense for others to acknowledge.

Excuse me, but my birthdays are but momentary landmarks in time. I’ve gotta move on…. I’ve still gotta lot of livin’ to do!

And The Blogs Just Keep On Comin'

The 2008 tally of my blogs is 128, which includes Parcel Post 08, Florida Menagerie 08, Hernando Hews 08, and The Rae Way.

Over all, it's a relatively small number as compared to many other blog sites but I do my best with the time I spend writing.

Besides, I can't sit at the computer all day long.... I'd have a flat ass sooner than I would otherwise!